Matrimony, a form of soul work, impacts our world

Thomas Moore's book, The Soul of Sex provides the scaffolding for "The holy tree of Marriage," posted 14 June 2012, in which the blogger refers particularly to Moore's chapter "The Marriage Bed":

 “Matrimony is a form of soul work, and marriage is the most potent alembic available to us where we can become initiated into the rudiments of community and the basics of intimacy. In this context sex is the primary ritual. It’s one thing to resolve arguments and tensions in a marriage through conversation and counseling, but it’s another to perform the mysterious rite that addresses the deepest mysteries of the union.”

Passages shared underlie Moore's repeated concern that we need to expand our understanding of soul to hold more and we need to see how soul directly affects community and the world:

"Each marriage is a laboratory for the soul, and in each marriage lies the deeper laboratory of sex, the holy of holies, where passion, union, differences, pleasure, difficulties, and even work achieve their necessary balances. If couples realized the importance of their lovemaking and its impact on the world around them, from their children and neighbors to the nation and the world, they might have a less personalistic, less psychological view of their sexuality, and in that broadening they might enter into sex with larger vision and greater joy. Everything in life suffers when our vision of it is too small and too personal.”

Responses to this post appreciate the need to enlarge soul capacity.

Let's look at deep sensuality as enhancing life

For the site Handbook for Heroines, Jill Hinton writes "Why I have the hots for Jesus" that offers a possible online dating profile for him. Hinton assures readers that she doesn't mean to sound irreverent as she describes Jesus as a possible love interest. She writes, "The idea that Jesus would make an awesome boyfriend first showed up while I was reading Thomas Moore’s The Soul of Sex: Cultivating Life as an Act of Love. This is hands down one of the most influential books I’ve ever read, one I think should be required reading in college. It posits the revolutionary idea that there’s a positive, life-enhancing way to look at sensuality that leaves behind all the self-loathing and inauthenticity that comes along with modern views of sex."

Hinton imagines, "Although I don’t really consider myself a Christian in the traditional sense of the word, I do believe Jesus embodied just about every value I try to live. He was an amazingly compassionate and influential man who encouraged us to be open to life, to deepen our understanding of others and to deepen our convictions of kindness. To paraphrase Thomas Moore, Jesus’s life 'reminds us that the kingdom of heaven is not a destination, but something that resides in and around all of us.' In other words, deep conversations with him at Kava House would be amazing (I picture him ordering dark roast, free-trade certified coffee)."

After acknowledging a traditional view of Jesus as celibate, she quotes Moore directly:

"'…it may seem a contradiction to be chaste and morally tolerant, but Jesus’ celibacy never seems anxious or repressive. It allows him to love in an embracing way and is so comfortable a part of his philosophy and style that he doesn’t have to judge others for their sexual ways.'”

Hinton continues, "Jesus was a guy who was in love with life. He embodied a beautiful audacity and was 'able to live with an intensity inaccessible to most,' according to Moore. So it’s not all that surprising that this is exactly what I’m looking for in a guy who I want to spend the rest of my life with." She includes a picture of Jesus for his online  profile.

Desire indicates what the soul needs and seeks

On her blog, Unleashing, Erin Clark responds to Thomas Moore’s book, The Soul of Sex, in her post today. Clark follows Moore's quotes from the subchapter "Erotic Intelligence" with her own interpretations and reactions to his words. She includes Moore’s observation:

"Desire has its own intelligence. If we think that the mind is the best guide through life, we will make choices by gathering opinions and weighing the options. But if we follow the soul, we will understand that desire is also an indicator of what is needed and what is best. We may be confused, especially at the outset of desire, about the exact nature of our soul's longing, but over time we will become clearer about what the soul is seeking. This is a dynamic way of life rooted in deep longings that call for a response, rather than a static way based on fixed ideas about what is prudent."

Clark responds, "Foregoing prudence is a shameless rebellion that makes my skin tingle. Certainly the part of Unleashing that excites me the most. Not being held down by fixed ideas ― but allowing a wilder instinct have its say. Always learning more and more ways to do this wisely and deeply. Allowing me to have a stronger trust, which lets me have more profound intimacies in my life. I love even more being in a position to help others strengthen their own experience of trust and gain deeper, more intimate experiences of their own."

William Blake: No body is distinct from the soul

Today the site Reuniting: Healing with Sexual Relationships mentions Thomas Moore’s book, The Soul of Sex with a link to his essay, "The Temple of The Body: Sex in an Anti-Erotic Age". The post includes, "Gotta love a book that has pages and pages about Aphrodite. Tho I must admit I'm finding Artimis quite attractive these days. There is soooo much forgiveness in this man's writing." Accompanying Moore quotes, the page includes:

"Man has no Body distinct from the Soul
For that called Body is a portion of the Soul
Discerned by the five Senses,
The chief inlets of the Soul in this age."
― William Blake

Blogger enjoys messages in The Soul of Sex

Today Jenni blogs about Thomas Moore’s The Soul of Sex at Musings of Mommy Bee. She describes it "as an interesting book, and with such an interesting thesis. I stumbled across it at the library and read the inside flap and had to bring it home."

She writes that Moore is a conservative Catholic and, "He is very pro-marriage and pro-fidelity, and also pro-spirituality. As he says "If there is any substance in the common sentiment that sex is sacred, it would seem appropriate to explore that sacredness in religious terms." This book also isn't erotica, or a 'how to' in any sense. Like I said, it's philosophy."

Jenni includes favourite quotes from the book in her blog post and concludes with one she particularly likes, found on page 248:

"It seems clear to me that the plague of sexual images that fill the internet and line our city streets, and the so-called gratuitous sex that spices most grown-up movies are exaggerated, autonomous, and noisome because we don't understand the importance of a sexy road or an appealing building or a sensuous workplace. The principle at play is simple: whatever we don't have the imagination to weave into our human lives beautifully and intimately will haunt us in the form of autonomous temptation and shadow values. There seems to be no middle ground. Either we build a beautiful road or the ugly version will soon begin to destroy the culture we are striving so hard to make. As always, our choices are basic: either Eros or Thanatos, sex or death."

Artist sees love as fuel of life in The Soul of Sex

On the blog, PoedyPencilPrincess: The Ranting of a Mad Artist, New Brunswick artist Jody Noelle Coughlin describes herself as "a painter and a writer, photographer, mother and wife." In yesterday’s entry, "A Beautiful Rainy Day" she blogs,

"Ian and I had a few hours to ourselves this morning so we went out for lunch and strolled around town. We went to the library and I picked up a book called The Soul of Sex by Thomas Moore. I am loving this book. It seems to be telling me the things I have known for so long about sex, love. Eros. It speaks about love being the fuel of life. It speaks about how sexual encounters change us even if we want to believe they were casual. I have always felt that. In fact, I have always been fascinated by the transcendence I felt when in contact with another human being. A kiss. A touch. These things all bear great meaning for me. Always have. Hopefully they always will.

So, I look forward to what else I might discover (or rediscover) within this book. I am glad I stumbled across it today. I also picked up Atwood's The Handmaid's Tale and Ian picked out A Mad Desire to Dance by Elie Weisel for me. So, I suspect I shall be completely drunk on literature in the coming weeks. I am glad. I could use the infusion."

Sex addict quotes Thomas Moore in journal entries

EDITOR'S NOTE: Linked site contains visual sexual content unsuitable for young viewers. The complete Journal entries on the site, quoted below, do not depict visual sexual content found elsewhere on the linked site.

The adult web site, Cassandras Journey expresses [Cassandra's] "personal journey from unassuming girl next door to voracious sex addict." In her Journal section, "Cassie" refers to Thomas Moore as her "favorite commentator on the subject of sex ..."

14 July 2010: "Fetishes — what’s up with that?"
"Too often, it seems to me, sexual fetishes are depicted and portrayed as weird, lamentably necessary ways in which certain individuals feel compelled to realize their sexuality. It would be more fair and constructive, I think, to talk about fetishes as idiosyncratic ways in which couples relate to one another sexually. As Moore explains, "the point of sexual experimentation may be to sense together, in mutual generosity and complicity, the joy of transcending rules and expectations. In this spirit communities have often celebrated important religious festivals with orgies and other kinds of sexual license, breaking into the realm of spirit by means of sexual overstepping." Maybe we’re not overstepping because of a unilateral fixation or selfish route to satisfaction, but instead because we want to go somewhere uncommon together."

7 July 2010: "Soulless relationships"
"Thomas Moore, the philosopher and former monk who wrote the bible on sex (The Soul of Sex) and the bible on love (Soul Mates), has a lot to say about what happens when erotic experience is absent from life. Life, properly lived, he passionately explains, is itself an erotic experience, an act of love, and what happens in the public sphere is entirely and indelibly connected to what happens in one’s bedroom. Essentially: if your sex life sucks, that soils everything else (and by sex life we mean erotic life, because one can actually experience eroticism without sex)."

7 July 2010: "Tomato ecstasy"
In this post about the relationship between food and sex, "Cassie" quotes Thomas Moore:
"When we fail to notice the essential juicy, lush, and meaty vibrancy of tomato, somewhere inside us our ‘heart’ shrivels up, our succulent fecundity is unrecognized and uncalled-for. We too are dry and mealy, and longing for something to break us open and make us feel alive and flowing." This is a passage called "Tomato ecstasy" in a book by a Zen priest, as quoted by my favorite commentator on the subject of sex, Thomas Moore."